12 BEST & WORST REMAKES

12 BEST & WORST REMAKES: #12

Best #12: Fatal Attraction

I come from a pretty solid home. My parents have been married for nearly 50 years (I’m sure my mom could give an exact number, but this post doesn’t have pictures of her grandkids in them, so it’s a safe bet she isn’t reading this), and I never saw any crazy-ass drama unfold under the roof I called home. Now, being exposed to marriage through stability is great and all, but seeing the worse case scenario of infidelity play out while you’re eating popcorn is another — especially if it involves child abduction, property vandalism and an extremely disturbing recipe for rabbit stew. Fatal Attraction caused me to make a personal vow to never “wander” in a relationship — not that I was anywhere near that being a problem when I was 16. Or 20. Or 30. Jesus, what a lonely life I’ve led. But little did 1988-Me know that a vow like that does come with perks: there’s no reason whatsoever for me to SnapChat a picture of my dick to anyone.

Fatal Attraction was based on James Deardan’s 50 minute short entitled Diversion. The story, a normal, everyday family man who strays from the sanctity of his marriage, grabbed the zeitgeist by the throat (and balls) in the same fashion Jaws hit beachgoers and Psycho turned off people who enjoy sharing sandwiches with amateur taxidermists.

It may not have invented the stranger-danger category, but it sure as hell gave it legs to sprint (the genre is still alive and well with films like The Gift still making bank). It also has the dubious achievement of being the first in the Chronicles of Michael Douglas’ Strange Sexcapades, segueing into Basic Instinct and Disclosure. And maybe Behind the Candelabra, if you’re a purist.